Riverside Arts Walk Logo Re-Design Contest

There is an official entry form.  Please address all comments to the Riverside Arts Consortium.  Thanks!

Why Freeway Traffic Slows to a Stop

I have a theory as to why traffic on our local freeways slow to a stop on a regular basis.  It's not due to accidents or there being large ojects in the middle of the road.  I know this because the traffic always mysteriously opens up again at some point and there is no trace of evidence that it had anything to do with one of these two reasons.  It is merely the culmination of traffic acumulating behind slow drivers in all lanes.  These slow drivers create a bottleneck resulting in stopped traffic several miles behind them.  I know they do not realize they are doing this, but it is not ok.  We have a lane dedicated to the slow,  the far right one.  That's where you belong. 

If you are in one of the two far left lanes, these are for drivers who plan on going about 5-10 miles over the speed limit.  And this is acceptable.  Its what keeps the natural order of things and keeps traffic accidents from happening.  You slow people in the fast lane, you cause the accidents.  People are cruising along and then come up upon your slow ass and this causes problems.

Now I'm going to give a few of you the benefit of the doubt that you don't realize you are a slow driver in the wrong lane.  So here are some tips that may help you identify yourself.

• More than 3 cars have passed you on the right
• Your car was manufactured before 1995
• You see a string of 4 or more cars piled up behind you in your rear view mirror
• You are on your cell phone, handset or handsfree, doesn't matter
• You are eating
• You are reading, yes you are, I've seen you and it scares me
• You are following a GPS or map, yes this slows you down because we all have to turn down the radio and drive slow, especially when we're getting close, to follow those things

Please review these tips, identify yourself and move to the right please.

Costco and Sams' Club Shoppers

I really dislike shopping at these big warehouse stores.  Yes, the prices and quantities are great but the experience is darn right aggravating.  There are people EVERYWHERE and they don't know how to behave in a store such as this.  Here are the most common offensive behaviors:

• Bringing too many people on your shopping trip
• Ok, so you have 5 children, your auntie, uncle and grandma all living with you, you don't all have to go on the shopping trip.  This just makes it harder for others to get their chores done.  Yes, going to Costco is a chore for most of us, not a fun weekend family activity.
• Stopping in the middle of walkways to hold a family meeting, chat with friends or do nothing but block the way.
• Others are trying to get their shopping done and go home.  There is not enough room for you to gather, because so many people go in groups 10-14 as it is.
• Moving at a snail's pace
• I am here to get my chores done and move on to my next errand, this isn't a park.  Keep moving or get out the way.
• Darting out in front of moving carts or stopping suddenly in the walkway
• When these oversized carts are full they carry momentum, so if you get in the way you or your children may get smushed, its before for everyone if you leave some of the extra people at home and be aware of your surroundings.
• Discarding your used portion cups in places other than trash cans
• It is gross finding your half eaten corn muffin in a box I have to use to pack my items to bring home.

The following behaviors are encouraged:

• Move with purpose
• Shop alone whenever possible
• Do not sample at every station
• Leave children at home

The following are suggestions for the warehouse stores:

• Remove sample stations from your marketing strategy
• Limit the number of people admitted into the store with one card

Welcome to Fontucky

NASCAR rolls into town this weekend at the California Speedway which happens to be a stone's throw from my house.  There is a parade route for the NASCAR haulers that runs just outside my subdivision. 

This is when we earn our name.  Urban Dictionary definse the term Fontucky as

"City in Southern CA, actually called Fontana. Outdated term used to desribe the amount of rednecks who used to live there." This weekend the name won't be outdated.

                                 http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=fontucky

Plane Etiquette

It still surprises me that so many people are unfamiliar with proper behavior when on a plane.  So here are my Top 10 Worst Passengers.

10.  Those who fully recline coach seats....there is no room for fully reclined seats.  I don't want your head in my lap.

9.  Chatty Cathy...I have my earbuds in, iPod out and my Kindle all ready to go, no, I don't want to talk to you.

8.  People too cheap to purchase a seat for their child.  If you can't afford to travel comfortably, stay at home.

7.  Those who hog the overhead compartment.  They put both carryons and a coat or bags in the compartment and yell at you when you try to share the space.  You are supposed to keep your smaller carryon under the seat in front of you.  And you have to share.  I'm not gate checking my bag just because your mother never taught you this.

6.  Those who eat smelly food on the plane.  We're gonna be on this thing for the next 2-5 hours, I don't want to smell your kung pow chicken and corn nuts for that long.  And don't offer me any...I'm not going to eat your leftovers.

5.  Loud groups, it's great that you are all travelling somewhere fabulous together, but if you're not sitting together, don't try to yell across 3 rows to converse during the flight.  The flight noise is bad enough without you yapping it up.

4.  "Unloading" in the plane lavatory or passing gas in your seat.  Work that out before we get on board. 

3.  Those who hog both arm rests.  Pick one, share the other.

2.  The "Know-it-Alls".  I have travelled many times, I know the drill.  Don't try to enlighten me with your dribble.  I got this.

1. People who try to rush to the front of the plane to exit instead of waiting for their turn.

Krewe of Eve

Krewe of Eve Location: Mandeville, LA
Date: February 25 , 2011
Theme: Eve's 25th Masquerade

Time: 7:00 p.m.
Floats: 26Bands: 15
Membership Size: 450
Year Founded: 1986
Float Designer: Blaine Kern
Krewe Website: www.kreweofeve.com

I had the great privilege to ride with the Krewe of Eve in Mandeville, La last Friday night.  The excited screams of all the kids and the crowds was more of a rush than I ever anticipated.  Having grown up in Biloxi, MS and going to the local Mardi Gras parades I knew that these parades were great family events and a part of the regional heritage.  I know that not everyone acquires an appreciation for parades, including my husband who just stood in the back of the crowds the whole time.  But, I'm glad he came to support me.

Coming Soon-Mardi Gras

I leave in a few days for New Orleans to celebrate Mardi Gras and ride with the Krew of Eve in Mandaville, La.  This can only mean that I'll have tons of new material upon my return.  Till then, laissez les bons temps rouler!

                                      

Happy Driving

Each time I leave work I encounter a situation where traffic backs up several lights of those of us needing to make a right hand turn onto the freeway (highway for my Southern friends).  And each day as I patiently wait my turn in that lane, I see 5-10 other cars squeeze their way into the lane up near the ramp as if they forgot that this was going to be their turn and as if the rules of the road did not apply to them. 

It is 5:10pm.  You are leaving work.  You are familiar with this route.  You do not get a free pass to the front of the line just because you are you.  They rules of the road do, in fact, apply to you.  You are not special.  And if I didn't drive such as nice car, you might find that you have to trade paint to sneak in next time.

I don't have road rage, I'm the one who waited patiently in the correct line of traffic.  I just don't have to leave room for you to move in.  I'm perfectly fine riding the tail of the car in front of me as safely as I can to see to it that you don't get an opprotunity to zip in front of me and cut me off.

If you are someone who does this, please stop.  You're really not going to get home any faster than I do.  Because I will pass you in my sports car on the two lane ramp before you ever make it to the freeway.  Happy driving.

Skintimate Flirty Mango Shave Gel

Smells like playdo.

Contractors

I am in the process of getting quotes for a new fence for our backyard.  I invited one local business and one major home improvements store, Home Depot, to my home to place bids.  

Mike's Fencing was about to come out the day after I contacted them, were on time and pleasant to have at my home.  They left a bid without too many questions and I felt very comfortable with them and their  product options.  They also called to follow up on their proposal.

Scheduled a week later (presumably because they're sooo busy) was the contractor for Home Depot.  This guy was late, although he called.  I found this guy very pushy and too much a salesman...which is a lot considering I've been in sales myself for over 10 years.  He asked to see the other quotes which I felt was rude.  He also said he was obligated to show me the Home Depot product but that it was not of high quality.  He went on to push his own line of products.  He also made a point to tell me how busy they were and were having to schedule at least 3-4 weeks out.  It's important to note that I have a deadline that needs to be met for this project.  He asked me for specific dates, which is good, but I went to get my own calendar and he tried to get me to come back to look at his.  I have my own calendar and appointments that I need to be mindful of, I found it presumptious of him to think that his calendar would suffice.

What is most concerning is that he was using the Home Depot brand to sell himself and his services while at the same time disparaging the Home Depot product.  He also used the fact that he was with Home Depot as a reason not to buy from a local business.  This also alientated me because I have spent my career helping local businesses compete in local markets via their advertising choices.

So I have some advice for the large retailers out there:
1) Be careful which contractors you choose to work with, they may not be working for you at all
2) Disuade those contractors from using your brand status as a reason for someone not to go local, it is desperate and tacky

I think I'll be going with the local business, Mike's Fencing for this project.

Google Street Maps

I saw the Google Street Maps vehicle today in San Bernardino, CA. Prepare to moon the world, So Cal.

See it here:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/5/51/GoogleStreetViewCar.JPG/800px-GoogleStreetViewCar.JPG

Super Bowl Sunday

A day for eating, drinking, tweeting, gambling, facebooking, criticizing and enjoying the company of friends and family. Isn't life great.

Top Speed

The top speed of white, gold and silver Camry's must only be 60 mph.

I'll start with a Peep

Mr. Important

We've all met one, worked with one or, heaven forbid, had one in the family. This is the guy who is the expert on everything and carries multiple electronic communication devices and yes, one is still a pager. Unfortunately this is also the guy who calls back to the office to tell the "secretary" (Business Analyst who happens to be female) to get a fresh pot of coffee brewing because he is bringing a client in for a meeting, slurps the coffee, then calls home to his wife and tells her via the answering machine to pick up (because she is not allowed to answer the phone otherwise).

I've met several of these throughout my years but none has topped my first. Sam (that's his real name) went as far as to call on my clients and pretend to be my boss on top of being smelly and spending all his time dreaming up "big" ideas that would never come to fruition. He should have got off his ass and sold something (we were in sales). He was about 25 years older than me but we were at the same position in our careers and that bugged him. He was Mr. Important, of course he should be viewed as my superior.

Mr. Important is closely related to Mr. Techie, Cheap Bastard and Know-it-All.

Tell me about your Mr. Important.

Peeps, Places and Things-the Beginning

We all come across people, places and things in our daily lives that make us stop and stare or sit and cry or just double over in laughter. The purpose of this blog is to experience those moments together. Feel free to post your own and we will all laugh and appreciate how great and funny life can be. So let's begin.